Communication TwentyFourSeven is back with another blog, and this week, we’re tackling conflict resolution! Conflict is an uneasy fact of life, something we’d rather turn away from when confronted with it. However, given its inevitability, I think most of us can agree it’s important to be able to handle it deftly when it arises.
Back in February of this year, the podcast had the honor of hosting Hesha Abrams. A luminary in her field, Hesha has over 30 years of experience and has mediated disputes involving corporate heavyweights such as Pepsi, Amazon, and Facebook. Given her illustrious background, we were over the moon to have such a masterful practitioner on our show. Listen to the episode here, and learn the actionable steps you can take to improve your relationships today!
I perhaps think about this issue more than the average person. For a year, I worked as an Americorps Volunteer with the Mediation Center of the Coastal Empire, a nonprofit located in Savannah, Georgia. The Center provides low-cost mediation alternatives to court for citizens in need (you can learn more about it here.) My primary responsibility was to enhance the Center’s standing in the community through our social media presence and fundraising efforts. It was one of my first experiences, post-Covid, being in an office and finding my place in a small, tight-knit team. I was ready, willing, and able, but also a bit green.
While listening to Ms. Abrams’ episode, I was reminded of my time at the Center. For obvious reasons, yes, Hesha is a mediator, and the episode is centered around conflict management and resolution, but also because so much of what she talked about aligned with what the center stands for and what I learned while working there.
During her interview, Abrams emphasized that we should not let the fear of conflict prevent us from resolving it. This especially hit home with me. The atmosphere in our office was hardly stifling or contentious; in fact, quite the opposite. Everyone was welcoming, friendly, and always willing to help. However, as a new team member with little experience, I was so anxious about seeming unprepared or being a nuisance that I wouldn’t ask questions when I had them. I eventually realized that asking questions is part and parcel of doing your job well.
The Mediation Center’s culture of openness and honesty and my coworker's genuine desire to see me succeed and thrive played a substantial part in my overcoming my anxiety. Disagreements and misunderstandings would arise every now and then, but they were never blown out of proportion, and I never felt attacked because I knew they cared about me.
Funnily enough, caring enough to respect and validate the person you’re in conflict with, according to Abrams, is essential to resolving conflict. When we disagree with our family, friends, or co-workers, we initially think of it as a battle we need to win. In reality, it’s a matter of understanding. To understand a person’s position, we must understand and respond to the underlying emotions. It may sound hokey on the surface, but it’s proven and works. Listen to the episode here to learn more about these practical tools you can use to drastically improve your relationships and resolve conflict.
You can also order Hesha’s book, “Holding the Calm: The Secret to Resolving Conflict and Defusing Tension.” In it, she dives deeper into the art of conflict resolution and explains how you can better handle disputes in your life!
Thank you for reading! To stay connected and dive deeper into the world of effective communication, follow the Communication TwentyFourSeven podcast, where we explore the intricacies of communication in various aspects of life.
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