*Sigh*…we are all so full of bullshite. Who are we kidding? We have all the time in the world. After all, time is relative, and depending on how we prioritize, we truly could have time to do it all. Am I a hypocrite for writing this article? It’s been three months since I last wrote anything. So, it depends on your perspective. Take a look at the date of my last blog. It says, and I quote, “3/07/13.” I have not written a blog in three months. Three. Freaking. Months. How is that possible?
Well, I didn't have enough time.
As I sat down to finally do some writing, and to call my own bluff, I took a look at my calendar for the last three months. What in the hell have I been doing that was so important that I neglected doing the very thing that I love? Those things that took my time away from my writing must have been very important stuff. Again, I call bullshite! Let’s take a look and call my own bluff shall we?
I see that I taught an online Business Communication class that began in March. That’s it. That’s all. Looks like I had plenty of time to write some more. I must have been super busy though. Clearly I forgot to put whatever it was that kept me from writing on my calendar.
Okaaaaay. Moving on to April. Still teaching that same online Business Communication class. Took the kids to Ft. Lauderdale for the weekend because the hubby’s been on travel for work and he was there. That was fun. Not much else happened in April. Oh wait. My 40th birthday was on April 16. That could explain some of the procrastination. Perhaps the depression that hit me was a reason for not writing anything. Writing would have actually helped. How stupid of me.
Moving on to May. I added an on-site Speech class. Oh look, one of my kids had an orthodontist appointment. Hmmmm…I added another on-site class, Intro to Human Communication. That means I was teaching three classes all at one time. I had time for that, but no time to write? That may be my problem. My kids had a spring concert. I missed that because of teaching. An issue with prioritizing is becoming apparent. But I did manage to get my son’s haircut. Oh goodie. I managed to take myself to the dentist. Good dental hygiene must never be compromised. I see my online Business Communication class was still going on. When in the hell is that class scheduled to end? Ach!
Still in May. Oh, had lunch with some girlfriends. Even introverts must socialize sometimes. Took the cat to get declawed and spayed...still teaching online…still teaching Speech…still teaching Human Communication…hold the phone. The syllabus for my Speech class for the fall was due. Had to turn that in. Attended some faculty training, got the house measured for some new flooring, took my daughter to the dermatologist, took another weekend trip to Ft. Lauderdale and a weekend trip to Augusta to see family.
Okay, so May was a bust. How about June? The online class and both on-site classes ended, but another Speech class began. Oh for the love of all that is holy. Why did I not give myself the summer off? Submitted my daughter’s passport application, took her back to the dermatologist, took myself back to the dentist. This time I got fitted for a dental guard. Guess all this stress is causing me to grind my teeth at night. What am I stressed about? I have vacation coming up next week.
So, somehow over the past three months, I managed to convince myself I was too busy to write. Perhaps I was depressed over my 40th. Perhaps I was mentally drained from all of the grading. Or perhaps I really wasn't as busy as I thought. Yeah, my calendar had a lot of things on it, some of it crap, much of it not, no doubt. But upon closer inspection, as busy as I was, I still somehow managed to catch up on watching Doctor Who, seasons 1 through 4. I said "sure" when asked to add more classes to my already "busy" schedule. I even read all three books from the “Fifty Shades” trilogy. (That was well worth the time by the way). I did some traveling and completed those everyday mundane tasks that we all have to complete. So why didn't I write something? Anything? What was my problem?
I did what all of us do. I managed to convince myself that I didn't have the time when I really did. You see, it’s all about priorities. I chose to do other things with my time. This is why I’m not a hypocrite for writing this. Who or what is to blame for me being “too busy” to write? My calendar? I’m the one who decides what to put on my calendar. The schools I teach for? I’m the one who decides whether or not I want to teach. My kids? They’re both teenagers and are pretty self-sufficient. Okay, I’m their chauffeur, but I’m the one who decides whether or not I’ll take them anywhere. My students? I’m the one who decides how much work to give them; therefore, how much grading I give myself to do.
There’s really no one or nothing left to blame, except for me. The same goes for all of you too. Don't be a hypocrite. The next time you start complaining about not having “enough time” to do what you love, or what you want to do, take a look at your calendar. Review the past few months. What did you choose to do instead? Because it is all about the choices we make. I chose to blog today instead of working on my next PowerPoint. And you know what? I feel so much better! I gotta do this more often…perhaps I should put it on my calendar.